It’s time for the fairly terrible Hogan Knows Best. Do you know who looks like a man? Here’s a clue. It’s not the Hulkster.

Actually, it’s a bit of a trick question. It’s Brooke and her mother. Men! They look like men look. Here’s another question. Who sings like a man? Here’s a clue. It’s not the Hulkster.

Brooke is singing at a reggae festival. Reggae festival? Which events promoter got paid off to make this happen? Now someone with an obvious brain malady has offer the boy named Brooke the cover of FHM magazine and an eight page spread.

Everyone refers to FHM as the “sexy magazine.” This is where that lipstick on pig phrase comes in to play.

What is the Hulkster’s response? He is upset. This causes him to hit all the local stores buying every copy of FHM available. That’s not too different from what I do on the first of every month.

Hogan Knows Best is on the E! clone, VH1. I can’t say that I am disappointed in VH1. Anything is better than adult contemporary music videos.

The Hulkster’s son, Nick, just got his driving permit. Also Hulk’s daughter, Brooke, is trying to get a record deal. Brooke looks extremely mannish at times. That’s what you want in your female pop stars. Every generation needs a Liza.

Brooke is upset that the last picture in her press kit montage makes her look fat. She should worry more about her chin. You could fill that in with a little Silly Putty.

The Hulk is trying to turn his daughter on to country music. That’s fun and naïve.

Hulk and daughter are going to the wellness center to get needles in their arms full of vitamins. What’s wrong with a vitamin pill? Are pills just for poor people now?

I don’t see how Brooke sounds different from any other artist in the world. I mean, obviously she is different from Johnny Cash. Quit being so literal.

Will Brooke sign with a record label? Let me see if I can find any clues that would help me. The title of the episode is Brooke Signs A Record Deal. Hmmm. There is a clue in there, I just know it.

Oh, she signed a deal. Surprise!