My temperature has been 100.(variable) over the past two days, so I don’t much feel like being a smart ass. Let’s just say I’ll be back next week, with sickness and Thanksgiving and all. Oh man, I sure hope I’m not too sick for turkey. And horns of plenty.

We pick up where we left off last time. Sydney and pal accidentally blew up a gang of CIA fellas. And inhalers. Now Syd is going to show us what emotions sort of look like if you squint really hard.

Syd’s father, who works for the CIA and is spying on SD-6, was investigated by the FBI for possibly stealing secrets. The FBI agents was named Bentley, like the car. His new name will be VW Bus. Also, he died in a car crash with Syd’s mom. The VW Bus isn’t a very safe vehicle.

Bah. More emotions. Maybe once we get to the next scene…oh. More emotions.

Whoops. Hello, used DVD. You seem to have stopped. Ahhhh, there we go.

SD-6 is going after a group called FTL. They do not deliver flowers. But they do hide codes in birthday cards. SD-6 will be going after the special decoders.

Emotions.

Time for some Syd disguises. She is wearing a dark wig and a piece of carpet. I wonder how much that dress costs per foot.

It’s a good thing guards never look up. Syd would have been dead long ago then. Really, though, what is up that’s ever worth looking at? Stars? Yeah. Been there, done that.

There is some sub-plot about singing and another one about Will investigating the murder of Syd’s fiancé.

Emotions.

The greeting cards were decoded by DNA. Time to dig up a body! After finding it, of course. Through disguises.

When you leave an apartment in a state of disrepair, who leaves the fridge door open? That seems a little much.

Emotions.

Syd is in a foreign mental institution. Sure, it’s dirty and dank. But it’s universally covered! It looks like the guards are on to her. Come one, electroshock!

Cliffhanger! You folks better vote for Alias again next week!

I have never heard anything bad about the Women’s Murder Club. However, I have heard only one good thing. Who is right, nothing or one thing? Or me? Let’s see!

A building just went up and exploded. Then there was a fake commercial for Double Cross, a book by James Patterson. The face commercial was pretty funny. But let’s get serious here. Someone is in jail for something.

Uh oh, I think there are clues and references from pervious episodes all up in here. Concentrate, Aric! You’re working at a disadvantage here.

Jamie, son of a death row murderer, escaped this exploding building. Either someone tried to kill him or he caused the explosion to cover his allegedly murderous tracks.

Do you know what doesn’t help your case? Running from the cops. Do you know what really doesn’t help your case? Murder.

So Paul, death row resident, was seen by the murdered Ben Cooper leaving another murdered person’s apartment. And Paul’s son, Jamie, is accused of murdering Ben Cooper.

They’re trying to solve to cases. Also, there are a bunch of women trying to solve these cases.

Halfway through, I have deemed this show stupid. Will it get stupider or better in the next 30 minutes?

And one of these women might be pregnant. You know what I don’t want to deal with? Murder and women’s problems.

And why do people drag people into bathrooms for private conversations? Need to talk in secret? Let’s go into a room with several other mini rooms in it that are far from soundproof and a good place for people to hide!

It looks like they have whitey on the run! I hate whitey so much! Actually, he is the district attorney who is something something with somebody and also might something to somebody something.

Guess who isn’t pregnant? Me!

You know what doesn’t stop executions? Protesters.

Guess who is the murderer! The former roommate! Tsk tsk, blaming whitey.

Execution stopped. Mysteries solved. Mouth stretched into a yawn. I could have used a larger helping of women’s issues. Just kidding. Women are stupid.

I haven’t watched 30 Rock in a while. I’m not sure why I gave up on it. Laziness, I suppose. Maybe it got yuck on it from My Name Is Earl.

The show started off with everyone smelling maple syrup in different sections of New York. And then, Liz was really excited about the delivery of her prescription shampoo. Your laughs have been fantastic!

The show is pretty quotable. Dare I say classic Simpsons quotable? To prove she wasn’t racist, Liz recalled the time she asked a black guy if he had seen Sideways. Ahhh, us white guys are so lame.

30 Rock is like three wonderful intertwining sketches that don’t overstay their welcome. We have Liz who thinks she lives next to a terrorist. Jack who slept with a Democrat. And Kenneth is trying to earn money to replace pants. All plots done well on their own. All great when put together.

Okay, 30 Rock. My opinions about you, the ones with no particular basis, were incorrect. My feelings, like Liz’s feelings about her neighbors, were wrong. How can we make this right, 30 Rock? What if I wrote nice things about you? Deal.

Take a look at yesterday’s poll, why don’t you?

What should Aric watch on Monday? - 03/17/08

Antiques Roadshow The Big Bang Theory How I Met Your Mother Two and a Half Men The New Adventures of Old Christine CSI: Miami Gossip Girl Pussycat Dolls Present: Girlicious New Amsterdam My Dad Is Better Than Your Dad

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19 votes. 19! You were one away from making me watch TV yesterday.

You couldn’t IM the guy in the next cube and tell him to vote? One vote!

Regardless, there are already 23 votes tonight. So forced TV is guaranteed. Don’t let that below 20 business happen again though. I mean it.

The votes for Monday jumped from 8 to 14. Mmmm, not quite enough. Today we’re at 16 votes. Only 4 more to assure my restricted TV viewing. Get on that.