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Trading Spouses: Meet Your New Mommy: Chase/Lane

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1. Hello:

   I actually live in the town in Oregon the crazy lady lives in and know all too much about people like that…there is indeed a handfull of people like that in our area…but not too many fortunately…

   It’s very sad. My wife and I cringed through the whole episode…and wondered just why we live here…but this is a great place to live and fortunately there isn’t too many people like that…

   Pretty amazing though. The visiting mother had it correct when she suggested the father is promoting the sports out of his shortcomings…

   These people, i surmise, have never left this little town and just really don’t understand anything outside of their little box.

   Please rest assured this certainly isn’t the way Oregon is in general. In fact, Portland I believe was voted the “most gay friendly” city in the US…

   Cheers…

   Comment by Aaron — February 3, 2007 #

2. just a note…I’m not sure why in my last message this blog progam blanked out the word meaning same sex partners… ???

   Comment by Aaron — February 3, 2007 #

3. I was pissed off while watching this show. The mother from the Chase family was just cruel and mean. How can such a person live with such a close mind and heart? Her family is just as rude as her, and it’s sad that there will be another generation like her. People like her are the reason the United States is hated so much, we just have cruel people here. I just hope the Lane family realizes how lucky they are to have LOVE regardless of the form!

   Comment by Kristin — February 3, 2007 #

4. I would rather have or live with the Lane’s family “birth defect” than have the Chase’s family defects or live in their world of hypocrisy.

   Comment by gabrielle p. — February 9, 2007 #

5. I am a big fan of this show, but this episode was out of control. This Chase family mother is a “monster”, and I hope she learns the error of her ways. It is sad to watch a mother teach her children hate. Someone really needs to set this woman straight! I am very glad that I live in California!!

   Comment by Amber — February 9, 2007 #

6. Date: 2007-02-04, 5:33PM PST

   If any of you viewed the recent airing of Trading Spouses, there is something you should know. I cannot begin to tell you how VERY edited this show is. There were so few scenes shown on T.S. Friday night that were reality. Yes, I do have very strong opinions about ILLEGAL Hispanics, and the negative effects they have on our country. I also have a sister-in-law that came to the US illegally. She is a very sweet and decent person. I also have several friends that are Hispanic, that I love and openly invite into my home and my life. What they (FOX) left out was, both of my beautiful girls have friends that are Hispanic, and they are at my house on any given weekend. Our home is (or was!) the place for the kids to hang. We have a pool, a 5 acre lot with a full acre of lawn, all sorts of “toys” for the kids to occupy their time with that offers them alternatives to going out and finding trouble. Our theory is if we make a fun inviting place for them, they will be here where there are no drugs, alcohol, or any other negative influences for them to see, hear, or try. We are so different than what was portrayed on T.S. There is no racial bashing going on here. I do say things about the dirt-bags that are thrashing our community, but they are not aimed towards any race in particular. What T.S. doesn’t show is my explanations before or after the racial slams. The show depicts me saying something mean and hurtful, but what it doesn’t show is the conversations before and after, that lead up to the “slams”
   I was born in G.P. and have been here ever since. I have seen how our community has changed over the past 40 years, and what our local newspaper shows is about 90% of the arrests and police reports involve a person with a Hispanic name. What I didn’t realize until just Friday night, you cannot believe everything you see and read or hear regarding media. When I was younger, there were very few Hispanics here, and they have just become an easy target to blame for negative reporting. I know now wrong this is.

   What I experienced during my visit to the Lane home was an extreme difference of opinions. Pepper had obviously grew up in a very different type of home then I did. I grew up with a very racially prejudiced father, who was against anybody with skin color darker than pasty white. He was also against traditional medicine, religion, and I’m sure many other things that I cant remember. He was married three times before he died, when I was 15, so he had more issues than I know. I loved him anyway! Fortunately, I have a strong enough personality (duh) that I was able to see through his beliefs, and form my own opinions (again, duh). What I did learn was, (and this is something that is really a burden) I have a huge lack of trust for people. Anyway, I am getting off the reason for my message, i apologize.

   Back to the show. T.S. portrayed me and my girls with filthy language. The words that were bleeped were things like: crap, dork, geek, shut-up and jerk. My girls are 15 and 17 years old, in a public school system. Their language is that of a typical teenager at their school. that has been allowed freedom of speech. My kids have been taught respect, and do not speak that way in general. Actually, many of the other kids they know are far worse with their language. My kids are really great, fun, loving girls with big hearts. They are no way abused or in danger living with such a monster as myself.

   My husband is in fact very intense when it comes to sports and the kids. There is no denying that. Again, he was so edited and made to look horrible. He was portrayed as throwing that ball that hit Cyndi in the ankle. The film had been inverted, (mirrored) and showed him throwing with his left hand (he is right handed). The very next scene, the glove and his Livestrong bracelet were back on the left hand. Charlie is involved in coaching, and there were 18 other girls there that day. He had a job to do, and Judy was there to sit with Cynthia. If I had been home, where i belong, I would have been there for her, supporting her, and giving her what she needed, including holding ice on her injury. That poor kid has been injured in sports every season for the past 3 years! When she broke her collarbone in a soccer game last year, (this was touched on during the show) we sat in the crowd watching her lay on the field. At that moment, there was no way for us to know the extent of the injury. So, being the fanatic that Charlie is, he said to himself, “C’mon Cheeseball, get up, shake it off”. It very quickly became apparent that her injuries were much more serious than something you could shake off. Of course, Charlie felt that pang of guilt that would accompany a comment such as his. We spent $4000 last spring on an emergency room visit with her to find out she was had an upset stomach. We had the choice to ignore her complaints, but we chose on the side of caution, and took her to the hospital (don’t worry, our deductible on our insurance is so high, we got to pay that ourselves). Abused children do not get taken to the ER for things like that….

   Anyway, I wish you could see the real Chase family. Our kid’s friends love coming over here. We are the “Cool” parents, according to their friends.

   If you watch T.S. again, take note in how FOX portrays the different families. When the Lane is shown, the music and images are happy, lovey, and generally cheery. When we are shown, the music changes, the scenery changes, and they NEVER show us giving/receiving any affection. That is so far from the truth. We hug, kiss, and love each other strongly, just as much as they show the lesbians doing. Yes, we joke sarcastically, and call each other “names”, but it isn’t allowed to be serious, malicious or nasty. It is just a sick way of being silly.

   What wasn’t shown, was the fun, laughter and good times there was while I was in San Diego. It was not all nastiness and mean-ness. Please, don’t believe what you watch. We were basically paid actors to portray real people. Really, I’m not the racially prejudiced, gay bashing monster I was portrayed to be. I do have opinions, and as far as I know, the right to express them. I was a paid actor to portray a real person.

   Oh, one more thing, don’t ask me how the money was spent…..I signed a gag clause.

   Sincerely,
   Julie Chase

   Comment by Private — February 10, 2007 #

7. I have a few questions for you, Julie. I watched both shows with great interest. I am curious to try and understand your point of view on the argument you had with Pepper. What were you trying to get across to her? What was she not getting? From where I sat (and granted, it may be due to the editing), it appeared that you took great pleasure in making Pepper squirm with your outrageous statements. It seems you understood your opinions were extreme, and you thought it was OK to unleash yourself on her because she was such a milquetoast (n. One who has a meek, timid, unassertive nature). It wasn’t until the party, where you were outnumbered and outwitted, that you realized that maybe people don’t want to be your victim.

   I have a family member who likes to say stuff sheerly for the shock value. Once nobody laughed at her statements, she stopped using them. I’d like to believe that was what you were trying to do in an attempt to get attention. You hurt a lot of people with your opinions, and have those of us who are in the minority wondering just how many white people hate non-whites. So, in that respect, you just passed the baton on mistrust. How do you feel about Asians? Blacks? Muslims? people with ADD? AIDS?

   Comment by Donna A. — February 10, 2007 #

8. Dear Julie,

   You are certainly not the only person to hate non-white people, the differently abled, or gay people. You are not the first to suggest that birth defects should be controlled through “population control.” Hitler espoused ALL of these ideas and he wasn’t any more of a “monster” than you are.

   By the way, that chunk of land you call home was stolen from “brown people” by the U.S. government through genocide, racist policies, and war in order for white people like your “illegal” immigrant ancestors to benefit. Think about that the next time you open your big fat ignorant mouth about about what “hispanics” are doing to this country.

   Comment by Alex M. — February 10, 2007 #

9. Julie,

   If you were quoted out of context, please explain how your comments could be misconstrued. I don’t see how saying the things you said could be taken any other way - even if surrounded by all kinds of nice things. The only exception would be if you were quoting someone else and they portrayed it as being your words. However, judging as how you acted in most other situations, I can’t see that being the case each time.

   I don’t like how you yelled at Pepper, because she answered you when you were finishing up your question. She was offering an opportunity for you both to find a compromise and you were unwilling. Did they edit that to look that way? I’m not sure.

   Did you know her son was watching/listening from the banister upstairs? Just curious.

   Why would you ask what happened to her daughter’s teeth moments after meeting her? It seemed every comment you had about the house was ungrateful and disrespectful. What does it matter if you’re sleeping in a child’s room? That seemed very snooty, if you ask me.

   Sorry if this is harsh, but I figured you could take it.

   I’d also like to see your answers to the questions posted by Donna A.

   I’d like to hear how you say you were a paid actor. Did they coach you? In the diary portions, did they ask you leading questions?

   Also, what does it matter if they showed your husband throwing the ball with his opposite hand? I don’t care if they flip the shot around to look better for the camera. That has no bearing on his attitude. why couldn’t he take a few minutes to console her instead of goating her as she’s limping? That’s a serious question. Sure, he was a coach, but I can’t imagine anyone getting upset because he took 5 minutes to attend to his injured daughter.

   Ok, this came across as an attack. Perhaps it is somewhat an attack, and I’m sorry if it hurts your feelings, but the things you said in the episode also hurt a lot of people’s feelings. Just for the record: I was offended by the things you said, and I’m a white, average build (not overweight), straight female with blonde hair and blue eyes. I don’t fit any of the demographics you were speaking out against. However, I do have an 11 yr old bipolar/adhd son, and a 9 1/2 yr old autistic/adhd son. If given the chance to go back to when I first got pregnant, I’d choose not to abort. A disabled child is a blessing. Not everyone can be perfect physically or mentally, but they are exactly the way God meant for them to be.

   I look forward to your replies.
   -Tamara

   Comment by Tamara — February 10, 2007 #

10. Unfortunately, guys, I don’t think Julie is actually reading. The date on that post is from several days ago, and I tried to find the first place it was posted, and someone went around to a lot of various blogs and articles in the past couple of days and posted it. So I don’t think Julie will actually be here to answer any questions.

    Comment by JJ — February 10, 2007 #

11. I missed the second episode darnit! Can somebody please tell me how the two families were instructed to spend the $50,000? The previews made it look like some horrific thing was done with the money.

    By the way… people are cruel and people are kind. There are all kinds. Every one of us needs Jesus!

    Comment by A. Messenger — February 12, 2007 #

12. I imagine the truth is somewhere in between.

    Comment by Aric McKeown — February 12, 2007 #

13. Julie’s excuses about the show are obviously irrelevant. If she was not who they portrayed her to be then she would not have broken down at the end and realized that she was a monster. That would never happen to someone who truly believes that they are doing the right thing (regardless of the music in the show or a million other kind comments that may have been made)….and if she hadn’t come to that realization I would have stuck with my original thought that such a hateful, worthless woman does not deserve to be alive. The only worthwile piece of information in Julie’s response is that her father was a racist, because Julie’s actions are clearly those of someone who has been abused and taught hatred…but as adults we need to realize and correct the mistakes of the past, so Julie needs to get in therapy and get it together before her and her husband destroy their children’s lives.
    p.s. - how unbelieveable was it at the dinner party when Julie was faced with what a horrible person she was and then she tried to blame Pepper….Julie get a clue, if you vioce your OWN beliefs and they make you feel bad in front of ANYONE at all, then it is time to re-evaluate.

    Comment by Travis — February 12, 2007 #

14. I thought the Andrews girl were the biggest spoiled brats I have ever seen. Who is honestly that lazy and stupid to sit around their parents house and not even do their own laundry and wake up at 4pm. Seriously GET A LIFE Grown-Women.

    Comment by Lena — February 23, 2007 #

15. omg, that episode just aired in australia and i was riveted. of course the show was edited julie you naive child. what they showed was an exaggerated snapshot of your personality, but comments like ” i hate hispanics” are very hard to take out of context. your attitude at the cafe in the first episode was so backwoods i was shaken into realising that people with your tiny minds exist. in australia that sort of behaviour ended in the 1960s. if people here dont like homosexuality at least they have the ability to deal with it in a mature way. you were so bizzare that it was the most entertaining tv i have watched for years!!!

    Comment by cameron — April 2, 2007 #

16. I was so shocked by julie’s backward opinions. In Australia people just don’t think like this. However i think julie learnt alot being away from her sheltered life and i think she began to realise everything wasn’t so black and white.I love Trading Spouses and I think it is a great opportunity for people to take a look at their lives and ask themselves, Is this who I really want to be??

    Comment by simone — April 3, 2007 #

17. I watched this episode as well (from OZ). I love uni, gives me the excuse to watch daytime TV.

    Anyway, Julie seems to be a ‘monster’ and she seemed to figure that out at the end, which is good. Just to pretend to be objective for a moment, though, I think Pepper was a bit harsh about the abortion/disabled child thing. I would actually abort a disabled child if I knew I was pregnant with one. This would be my choice and I respect the opinions of anyone who thinks differently and I admire anyone with the guts to knowingly have a disabled child.

    But guys, seriously, we have people like Julie in Oz. Look at Pauline Hansen, Fred Nile etc. The fact that these people are still in our political system means we have people like that here.

    Comment by Sally — April 3, 2007 #

18. Hi

    I caught the first half of the show but had to work the next day, can anyone tell me what happened on the next day and what did they do with the money?

    I hate that they drag it out over two days.

    Thanks

    Comment by Kate — April 8, 2007 #

19. how dare that julie say lesbians are born with a defiect, shes rude, horrible, that show should never been shown on tele.

    Comment by laura manning — August 15, 2007 #

20. Like most people, I was disgusted by the things Julie said on the show. TS is very obviously edited to make one side look really good and the other really bad, like Julie herself comments (above) you cant believe everything you read/see.

    So then Julie, you should understand that not everything you read in your paper about non-white people committing crimes is always true. Many crimes that are committed by white people in the US are NOT PRINTED or on the news, but let me assure you that ALL crimes committed by people of other races are printed/shown. Its a sick truth that white america promotes the ‘fear’ of other races.

    I don’t know what sort of abuse or tragedy Julie has had to live through to become such a cold hearted bitch but it truly sickens me to know that there are such stupid, racist, close minded assholes who think that there is something wrong with you if you are gay out there living among the rest of us.

    I hope that she will change her nasty ways before her children end up just like her.

    Comment by Chloe — May 8, 2008 #

21. I watched this 2 part episode for the 2nd time today and realised just how this was very cleverly portrayed to show Julie in a awful light and in a lot of ways her comments were dreadful and very offensive .
    However Pepper set Julie up when she had the dinner party and touched on subjects that she knew Julie has very strong opinions on and which were going to make all the dinner guests feel uncomfortable.
    To me that was not what a good Host family should do .

    Ohh ya my personal birth defect is I am gay but well I like to see things as they really are and do see how mean Pepper was too

    Comment by MargieH — May 11, 2008 #

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