Fresh off of her Emmy win for best comedy, The Office, Jenna Fischer squeezed in a bit of time to tell me what to watch for this week’s Celebrity Remote.

Here is what Jenna is having me watch.

7-8pm Big Brother 7 – All Stars on CBS. I am obsessed with this show. I’m rooting for Dr. Will.

8-9pm The First 48 on A&E. This is a pretty decent crime investigation show. I watched a bunch of these when I was on location shooting my last movie. Enjoy!

If you haven’t been paying attention, Jenna’s husband, James Gunn, was took control of the Celebrity Remote a few weeks back.

James also starred with Jenna in LolliLove, a film she also wrote and directed. It is certainly worth watching. I laughed myself silly. I hate that phrase. Forgot I said it, and pretend that I said something much cooler.

It’s 7pm. We should start. Let me mirror Jenna’s excitement about Big Brother 7 – All Stars. As bored as I was with this show at first, it has grown on me. It’s all about Dr. Will, really. I am shocked and delighted that he has such a seat of power. Surely the house guests must have seen season 2 of Big Brother. Will lied and cheated and did whatever he wanted. He’s doing it again, and it’s working again. These other people don’t deserve the money!

Tonight’s episode will be fantastic. One house guest gets the boot. Then there is the Head of Household competition. After that, the Head of Household must nominate two people for eviction. Finally, someone gets the other boot. Probably the left boot. It seems like you would use the right boot first.

Did I just rant about how clueless everyone was and how I hated it? That doesn’t make sense, because I like watching how ignorant Chicken George is. The fella has been struck by lightening! He’s no Benjamin Franklin, but he might just wish the turkey to be our national bird.

Danielle has been evicted. There is the right boot for you. Let us give this left leg a little stretch before we use it. Unless you’re driving a clutch. Then your left leg is probably as thick as a mighty redwood and ready for action.

Chicken George was saved from the boot yet again, which may only last another 45 minutes. We still have more house guest fodder to go through. Danielle wants to see Erika leave. Her name sounds awfully close to Aric, so I don’t want that to happen. I like things that remind me of me.

That’s a lie. If I had to live with me, I’d probably go crazy. What if there were a Big Brother full of clones? That would be awesome!

I almost forgot, I hate the Head of Household competitions. Slow paced questions about things that have happened previously in the house don’t get me very excited.

At the end of a boring five minutes of a zombie paced hokey pokey of question answering, Janelle is crowned the Head of Household. With only four minutes to plot and scheme, Dr. Will must work fast to get Janelle to do his bidding. Everyone is like Dr. Will’s secret butler.

Julie Chen has used the phrase “Big Brother history” a lot this season, as in “making Big Brother history.” As fun as these little twists are, I wouldn’t promote them as making any sort of history. It’s no record breaking beard of bees, after all.

Of no surprise to even brain dead monkeys, Chicken George and Erika are strapped in to the booting machine. Before the ejection device gets working, it is time for someone to win the power of veto. Unless Erika wins it, it won’t make any difference at all. If Erika does win, the man child that is Chicken George will be out.

Silly me, there is something more boring than answering questions from past episodes of Big Brother. Undoing knots. That is no sort of competition to be watching!

It’s a good thing I spelled everything about Erika out for you. She won the veto competition. Chicken George is on his way to the big hen house in the sky. Admittedly, that leaves the most interesting dynamics in the house. Then again, I could be surprised. There could be a tie (no damn pun intended) and Janelle could vote Mike or Dr. Will out. Game theory is certainly not boring.

Rats, I forgot that Mike is Erika’s “showmance.” Both Dr. Will and Erika will be voting for Chicken George. That’s what the Vegas odds say. I imagine. I also imagine that Vegas is lined with candy floss. That probably isn’t true.

I’m right! Vegas is lined with candy floss! Oh, and Chicken George is out. But he did get to meet Colonel Sanders. I know it’s like crying wolf one too many times, but that part is true.

With Big Brother behind us, we move on to The First 48, which Jenna got addicted to while filming a movie. Probably her upcoming film titled Quebec or the other one called Blades of Glory.

The premise of this reality crime drama is the fact that finding a murderer is 50% less likely if the suspect isn’t found in the first 48 hours. On this evening, a victim was shot while shopping for groceries in a convenience store. Luckily, a video camera was set up inside and outside the store. Unluckily, it didn’t catch the shooter or the victim. Luckily, it did show that someone else got shot, pulled a gun, and then escaped.

Jenna was right. This show is pretty great. I’m enthralled.

Hey now, we’re on another case. That switched over kind of quickly. They must follow a couple of cases each episode. I was thrown, but now I’m back. How are you doing?

A father of two was killed in a Haitian community, I think. Or mother of seven was killed in a Polish community. I was confused and wasn’t paying attention. Either way, the girlfriend was with them when they were shot. She got a nice look at the killer’s face.

There are still about 44 hours remaining on each case. With so many leads, it would be hard to mess this up.

The girl whose “baby daddy” was shot remembers the shooter from high school. In a “well, that’s smart of them” moment, the police have a library of yearbooks from local high schools in their records. I never thought of that. It makes a lot of sense to have that though.

Back to the first case, the police have the intended victim in custody. They also have him crying, which is good. He even took the picture of the lady caught in the crossfire. He’s going to give up the information. Emotion clouds judgment. The tin man was better off without a heart.

The sadness of this show is made better by this cookie dough ice cream cake from my birthday. Hooray!

The crying fella had a first name and a general location of the murderer. The police think they found a photo of the shooter, but now the crying fella has gone missing. Whoops, that’s going in someone’s permanent record.

The investigators in this show are just regular guys, which I like. We don’t hear about their romances with someone in another department. The chief isn’t trying to frame them for corruption. No crap. Just reality.

With a positive ID in the first 48 hours, the streets were searched for the father murderer. Four months later, they finally track him down and capture him. That’s 2874 hours more than 48 hours. That would make for a much more confusing title.

The other suspect called through a bail bondsman and said he’d turn himself in. He lied. He was caught two months later. No one was caught in the first 48 hours. Maybe these officers shouldn’t be just regular guys. Maybe they need the inter-office drama to sharpen their skills. They should watch CSI and take notes.

Sepaking of inter-office drama, if you aren’t already, you should be watching The Office. It would be the funniest show on television even if the Emmy’s didn’t feel the same way. Luckily, they do. All glory to Jenna Fischer. She went the kind route and picked out programs tonight that didn’t suck. Watch all of her stuff that I listed. It’s up in my words somewhere. I know you’re smart. You’ll find it.